I Anointest My Head with Oil

We had a great weekend of hospitality. It’s been a while since we had anyone over for dinner, so I guess we’re trying to catch up. Friday night, we had Shawn and Jennifer, who recently joined our young couples Bible study. They have a three-month-old baby, Faith, who is amazingly quiet! Anecdote of the evening: she started to get a little fussy, and the cats went nuts, never having heard a baby before. They both slunk around, trying to figure out where the whimpering prey was hiding so they could bite its head off. Or at least, that’s what I assume they were thinking. Maybe they were just curious. Shawn laid Faith on the coffee table to change her, and first Bugaboo then Muffin decided this sacrifice on the altar needed to be investigated. Probably the worst that would have happened is that Bugaboo would have licked her head, which is what he’s taken to doing to Muffin, and Muffin would have tried to find feathers on her person (Muff can open my giant craft drawers and dig out my feathers, no matter how deep we bury them!) but just to be safe, Matthew locked the cats away. I think we’ll be inviting over lots of couples with babies this summer so the kitties can get used to squalling infants.

On Saturday night, Eric and Kristen came over. We met them soon after we moved to RI, so they are “old friends” compared to most of the couples we know here. I won’t bore you with any anecdotes about their visit, because the key point is simply this: I made bacon to sprinkle on the salad. I poured the bacon grease into the empty gravy jar. That’s all.

Yesterday afternoon, I was finishing up the rest of the dishes (I was feeling adventurous Saturday so I made a three-course dinner. There were a lot of dishes.) and needed to throw away the jar of bacon grease. Maybe the grease had reacted with the bit of gravy in the jar, because it hadn’t set up at all. I guess I had pitched the lid for the gravy jar when I opened it, and I didn’t want to dig through the past two bags of garbage to find it. So I glanced around the kitchen for a lidded container. I spotted a big, empty plastic animal cracker jug. I unscrewed the lid and…did I carefully place the open jar of liquid bacon grease inside? Did I pour the grease into the bigger jug? No. I dropped the open jar of liquid bacon grease down into the big jug. When it hit the bottom, the cup ranneth over, straight upward in a fountain of grease. It doused my forehead, my shirt, the floor, and probably other spots in the kitchen I haven’t discovered yet.

I stood there stunned for a moment, looking remarkably like David, I’m sure. Then I went to show Matthew, trying to keep the grease from dripping off my nose, so he could laugh at my expense. Then I finally looked at myself in the mirror. It was even in my HAIR! Which proceeded to receive its second washing of the day.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. The End.

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  • http://www.xanga.com/mmmattress mmmattress

    It was awesome. You’re cool. I like you. The End.

  • http://www.xanga.com/Monyikka Monyikka

    I would’ve done the SAME thing with grease– but now, I will not! 

  • http://www.xanga.com/hannahbarton hannahbarton

    RYC: HAHAHA (Child-birthing hips)! Yeah, I always feel a little chubby because I have a more wide bone structure there. And I’m short.

    By “size… huge… currently,” I bet you mean that you’re a 4! I’m pretty much four all-around now. I bought all those new 6 clothes last fall, hoping I’d lose a few pounds and be able to wear them, but they’re pretty much falling off now. 

    Yeah, it surely was wonderful to have twice as many clothes in college!

    “Baby farm:” I laughed aloud.

  • http://www.xanga.com/hannahbarton hannahbarton

    A great story, and well-told. With Liberty And Justice For All.

  • http://www.xanga.com/hannahbarton hannahbarton

    What about that part, “my cup runneth over?” Wait… never mind.

  • http://www.xanga.com/schoolofmom schoolofmom

    Oh, too funny! I can see myself doing the exact same thing. In fact, I probably have but it just got lost in the mosaic of similar decisions I’ve made.

  • http://www.xanga.com/Liosliath Liosliath

    Oh, no! Was your shirt ruined? I did something similar and then got so angry at Casey when he laughed at me for it. Your reaction was much better!

  • http://www.xanga.com/MollyOOO MollyOOO

    Yuck.  Yes, Matt picked out my name and my subscriptions, and everything else except the purple. (Kate picked the purple… she wanted purple AND pink, but I had to put my xanga foot down somewhere!)

  • http://www.xanga.com/busymizzee busymizzee

    It’s good to make light of such incidences as they seem to occur far to often–at least in my life:)

  • http://www.xanga.com/inanera inanera

    We want beauty pageant pics!!! :)

  • http://www.xanga.com/daniellehanley daniellehanley

    If you’ve got to smell like something, bacon is generally a good smell.

    Are you guys as frugal with your A/C as you are with your heat? That might account for the grease not setting up (unless you put it in the fridge, in which case I can’t account for it at all.)

  • http://www.xanga.com/rachelboo rachelboo

    That’s too funny!!!  Did you have him take pictures of you covered in bacon grease?  It probably ruined your clothes you were wearing didn’t it?

    Hope you have a great evening!  Tell Katherine Bubbles says hi!  =)

  • http://www.xanga.com/Abbas_princess Abbas_princess

      Sounds like something I’d do.  Just a trick too, with pets and introducing them to new babies…. take the child down to their level, not the other way around.  We learned that when we took our Jack Russel up to Troy in his cradle.  She completely lost her mind.  Growling and snarling etc.  A couple of days later, we took Troy down to the floor, and she sniffed him, and licked him, and then promptly ignored him.  They became fast friends when he got bigger.  We had cats when the twins were born.  They couldn’t really have cared less about them *grin*

  • http://www.xanga.com/twentysixcats twentysixcats

    Oh yuck, I hate getting grease on myself! How long did it take you to wash all of it out? Yuck (I’m still shuddering from a mental picture!)

  • http://www.xanga.com/ezygiel ezygiel

    Danielle’s right – bacon is one of the better smells. gross, nonetheless. at least you could laugh about it. little girls can spray pee and things just like little boys (gwyn did it to me in the hospital ;-) )

  • http://www.xanga.com/inanera inanera

    Eh, ok. Guess I’ll have to wait like the rest of us. :)

  • http://www.xanga.com/cakelady cakelady

    I’ll have to try iced wine….hmm….I just keep thinking how girly I must be. Ha.

    I want to see pregnant pictures!

  • http://www.xanga.com/twentysixcats twentysixcats

    RYC: Yeah, well those cute little pictures of Lewis and Ebony being best buds are few and far between. Lewis generally likes to sit on TOP of Ebony and bite her. He also likes to push her off of wherever she is. I keep thinking that if I don’t interfere, then she will learn to stand up for herself… but it’s not happening yet.

    I think it’s hilarious that Bugaboo treats Muffin’s tail like a chew toy!! :-)

  • http://www.xanga.com/three_is_magic_number three_is_magic_number

    RYC: Very good point about the stomping out diseases. I can understand how infertile couples would want to try to have a biological baby if it was possible, and therefore think IVF is a good option if it’s something the couple can afford, but I am also worried about the moral consequences of giving individuals the option of hand selecting the “perfect” baby.

  • http://www.xanga.com/lemonmeringuedog lemonmeringuedog

    We are not going to see each other until the ceremony begins……we’re going to take some pictures beforehand (ben and his groomsmen and parents, then they will leave and I will do the same), but after the ceremony we will take pics of us together and with our families.

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